In the grips of it

…that’s where I am at the moment, and I come on here every now and then to check in on how people are doing on the sober journey. I have to say that even though I’m not doing well (at all) at the moment, it still gives me little niggles of hope to read about other people’s progress. I feel like the lurker now, that Belle blogged about. If I hadn’t read that I wouldn’t have had the courage to write this post. 

I have to be honest. I’m doing fuck all right now to stay sober. There are a thousand and one reasons for this that all don’t matter at the end of the day. All I know at this specific point in time is that I want to be sober. But I’m not. As long as I know that and don’t doubt it, I know I’ll be OK at some point. 

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5 Responses to In the grips of it

  1. Lilly says:

    Oh dear, poor you. I know that feeling so very well. I have been there SO many times. I’ve had soooo many starts and stops. Quit and slips and relapses. But it DOES get easier every time and every time something else new clicks. You haven’t failed until you stop trying altogether.

    Are you enjoying the drinking right now? Really? Is it making you happy and fulfilled? Is it giving you what you need? If not, trust that there is better on the other side. Why do you want to be sober? Tell us. Even if you’re still drinking. Tell us why you want to be sober.

    You can do it. Set a fresh date and try again. Today is as good a day as any to change your life.

    Hugs,

    Lilly

  2. jodwhy says:

    It can be relenting. It can crawl inside of you so deep that you just want a little pull from the bottle to relieve it. I’ve never seen a negative effect from being sober in anyone, but I have seen positive leaps in their life. I like to think of it as a burn on your hands. It constantly hurts, especially if you apply pressure, but, with time, it will heal. You can either learn from it, or put your hand in the fire again.

    • formyfamily16 says:

      I like this analogy with a burn on the hand…I’m only on day 2 , but yep – it’s smarting pretty bad!

  3. B. says:

    I am the lurker Belle talked about. I found your blog last night and just read today’s post. I’m interested to go read your old blog. We cAn do this…. All of us. Just like Lilly posted, are you ready happy and fulfilled drinking right now? I doubt just like me. I’m proud to read your rid of the negative BF…. That was hard I’m sure but must help you onto a sober journey. Thinking of you.

    B.

  4. rosesigner says:

    Hella cheesy but true….one day at a time.

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